On MY way

Photo: Zeytinbag, TR February 2007

Warmond, 30.IX.2008- raining like hell

Dear All,

This time again only in English (Scusa Chiara C. e a tutti quelli che con l'inglese hanno un brutto rapporto!).
I finally have my internet connection home and I do not have to subtract precious time to my days in the library at university just to check normal emails!
Great news... after years and years I finally have Skype and I can start using again MSN (for Skype I still need to buy the microphone... I'm nearly done!- you'll receive soon an email with my contacts... obviously I don't leave it here).
How many things to tell you... only one month has passed at university but it seems ages already.
Maybe because I'm really studying a lot, I'm satisfied with what I'm doing (especially Kazakh) and I have to do so many things (the usual Octopus, right Venetian Family?!) that I do not have that much time to get bored or sad.
I'm living on the lake here in Warmond, I forgot if I told you or not, with four persian cats and the owner of the house with whom I get along pretty well but we hardly ever see eachother.
In a way it's better... we meet together a couple of times per week at maximum for a short but nice chat and then we both live our own lives.
In this period I really need my independence, I need to take care about myself and analyze what I wanna do and be.
At univeristy I met a group of nice people and eventhough we do not see eachother everyday I know that they are there.
I'm so grateful for that!
Last weekend Eva came here (for the ones who do not know her, she is my best friend since we were at middle school) and we lived 24/24 hours.
We cycled like two crazies, we discovered a great market in Den Haag, also known as the Turkish Market... you can imagine the atmosphere. It seemed to be back in Turkey and I had one of the best day ever! I'm planning to go there often: first of all for the atmosphere, second because fruits and vegetables, meat (Halal) and fish are superb and increadibly fresh and cheaper than at the supermarket (half the price!).
Then... I had a great time with Eva (Grazie ancora cucciola!).
The only problematic thing was that yesterday I had a presentation of 2 texts at university, for "History and Social Theory" seminar, for which I had to prepare also 2 handouts.
I had then to study the whole night and morning (the presentation was at 3 p.m. luckily) but I managed, although I'm not 100% satisfied. I was very nervous and I think quite tired. When it was my turn to speak I'd rather go away from the room... I think that many of you know how anxious I'm and the ones who were at my BA thesis discussion remeber for sure that at the beginning I didn't manage to speak... dark in my brain... but it's over now and my fellow students at the end told me it was good...flattering me or truth? ;-)
This morning I slept till 10 and I took my morning free today to range my messy room and TAKE IT EASY.
My private life is a little bit confused nowadays, but I'm trying to take the best out of it.
I hope you are all fine.
A special thought for my Leni: I'm always waiting for you,
for Petr: what did you decide about your life? I wonder!
Duygu icin: Istanbul'da misin? Ozledim seni! Seni cok seviyorum, arkadasim! Haber ver, lutfen!

A kiss to everybody, only one, but full of feelings.
Take care.

Ci sono ma ancora senza internet

Ci sono. trasloco effettuato ma presa all`inverosimile.

un post veloce per dire in particolare alla mamma e famiglia che me la cavo, che non sono ancora sul lastrico e che l`universita` sara` motivante ma allo stesso tempo bella tosta!

scrivo presto.ora hi hanno solo fatto la cortesia di lascirami internet un nanosecondo.

un bacio.

I`m deadly tired but I can`t help

photo: Noordwijk Accordeon festival, 31.VIII.2008 (NL)

Hi everybody, this time only in English to let everyone understand and for the Italians who cannot, hope they`ll find some help for a translation.
I`m terribly tired, I guess mostly psicologically, but I did decide to write a bit.
A bit of what it`s happening in my busy and messy life, but always full of energy somehow.
Sunday I went to the best Accordeon Festival ever (ok... it was the first in my life, but I can definetely, absolutely, maximally say-all these adverbs for you Blu Deamon- that living with my dear Dalibor helped me to learn a bit about accordeon and really started to love it).
It was pure fun and joy, although I was the only person in all Noordwijk who wasn`t drunk- I did respect my antibiotic treatment-thus it must have been really great! Probably I`ve been seen as the crazy of the village since evryone was fooling around with a couple of Heineken each 15 minutes, while I was constantly drinking water and... going to the toilette-bloody infection- but I did exercise in taking pictures and amuse myself. A big THANKS to the whole Van Rhijn Family! ;-)
Then,after coming back completely sober from the party, I couldn`t sleep... because, besides thinking about my lost man and friend going around Noordwijk and lose theirselves, I was nervous... because Monday- yesterday- it has been my first day at University!
Woke up at 5 A.M. and couldn`t sleep anymore, then I decided to go out fast walking for 45 minutes around Wassenaar and while walking I started to think that actually I didn`t know WHERE I was supposed to meet all the other students.
6.30 A.M.: I`m back, run to my messy bedroom (I can justify myself this time: gonna move Saturday!) and try to find desperately my document folder and after digging and searching among shoes and socks (Clean ONES) I found it.
Surprise... no address, only the name of the building: in a word, PANIC.
Luckily the meeting is at 13. All the time of the world. I call the university and it seems I understood eveything but when I`m finally in Leiden after a long preparation, skirt, high-heel shoes and nice make-up (Come on, it was the first day!) I find myself walking around the city centre with a map in my hands, trying to find the right direction... and I found it!
Result: I`m gonna wait for 1.5 hour before the meeting starts.
I sit down on the little wall surrounding nice roses in the middle of the yard and 8 nice people come by: the first fellows I got to meet are Indonesian students (Islamic studies) who when they discover I`m Italian they told me the cutest thing ever "For sure you have an Italian face, it`s so beautiful". Completely red, after a while we did start a nice conversation and the time passes by.
The next one joining the company is a nice German student (as Duygu maybe remembers I always have problems with German male names... Friederich!) to whom right now I would give the name of Phil, but Ithink I`m gettin confused with Mphil (Master of Philosophy- the acronim of my university programme... what a shame).
PHIL, if u ever get to read this post, remember, nothing against you... I do have problems with some names!
Anyway we started a nice conversation as well and found out that also Phil is in my programme and in the Turkish specialization too...and that He also studied at the Edebiyat Fakultesi (sorry, no diacritical time now) in Istanbul and that we had the same Erasmus coordinator... the world is little sometimes.
It was soon 13 then and we started the everlasting meeting (till 17.10) which brought me back to university life and which made me feel extremely happy: I know it will be hard,the programmes are quite heavy, but I had the feeling after 1 year without studying that I was really back to what I like mostly and for which I`m gonna work hard.
The professors made an excellent impression on me... very diferent atmosphere then in Italy-at least in Venice- but I want to say that thanks God, the family atmosphere of Ca` Cappello is preserved (we are nearly ten students in the Turkish department for MA and Mphil.
Bought the first book to be read for Monday... let`s hope I`m gonna do it with my BOYS and moving to Warmond too in the weekend!
The lectures look great... now it`s just time to think about my future and Who I really wanna be.
At the moment I can`t say more...just thinking a lot these days.
So... Monday I`m really starting with the courses!
I think I wrote quite a lot.
I do feel better than last week, phisically speaking, mentally... you know me, the usual "crazy" one!
Hoping you are fine, my thoughts tonight in particular to two of my dearest Italian friends who are suffering at the same time in different ways, to my Czech family member Jiri who passed his final Master exam- so proud of You Jirka!- and to my Family, especially to my mother who told me what I needed to hear... "ONLY the ones who DARE will SUCCEED IN".
LOVE U Mum.

Good Night.
Buona notte.
Dobrou noc.
Welterusten.
Iyi geceler
طابت ليلتكم
Bonne nuit

P.S.: I won`t probably write back for a bit... still don`t know about my internet connection where I`m gonna move. Let u know asap.

NON SONO ANCORA A CONOSCENZA DI COME FARO` PER INTERNET NELLA NUOVA CASA, DEVO ANCORA INDIGARE... QUINDI SE NON MI SENTITE PER UN PO`, TRANQUILLI!

ZALTR: Ti sono vicina! Grazie della carica, vedrai che a tutto c`e` una soluzione!